Take heed to your ministry

For most if not all of my christian,,,,,,saved life, I have disqualified myself because of my age.  It is something I have struggled with for years.   I  talk with men who encourage me and give me scripture and tell me that, that’s a lie, etc. but it has never really changed me.  I don’t know that’s because I don’t want it to or I don’t trust them…….and that could be a big part of it.  I have a hard time trusting that speak positive things over/to me.   Anyway, tonight I was reading the 1Tim. 4 which is where Father took me to get my next memory verse.  (1Tim. 4 12-16)  HE has taken me to this verse several times, but something about tonight made it different.  It was almost as if HE was saying, “Son you have known it all along, now it’s time for you to step into it and accept/believe it.”  I know HE was going to take me to this verse last week, and I have kinda been looking forward to it.  I Timothy was a pretty cool guy, and these are words that Father spoke to him and is now giving to me.  I guess part of me says,  I’m not good enough,  I’ll never measure up…. I know, I know, but still that’s been the battle.  I have never been good or even enjoyed studying or researching.  But I have always been impressed or fascinated with men who can do that well.  And in 2 Tim. it says to, “study and be eager to present yourelf to God approved (tested by trial)”  I really like that scripture and would love to be eager to present myself to God approved but I really don’t like to study.  However I am seeing that it’s not about be liking to do it.  It’s about HIM commanding me to do so and I (being a good soldier of Jesus Christ) chose not to get entangled in civilian pursuits.  There were some great words spoken over me about a week ago and they had to do with just the very thing.  I think I have run from this for toooo long now, and today I chose to embrace it,,, embrace yes.  If this is what Pappa is calling me to, then I am all in.
I will let no one despise my youth, but I will be an example to all believers in word, conduct, love, spirit, faith, and purity.  Till Jesus comes back, I will give attention to reading, exhortation, and doctrine.  I will no longer neglect the gifts that are in me, with were given to me by prophecy when my men have prayed over me.  I will myself to them that others may see my growth in them.  Because I know that it will be used to further HIS Kingdom.

Thanks Dad.

Promises, Promises

I read Psalms 91 tonight, apparently I’m a big fan of Psalms. Psalms 91 is about safety in the presence of God. Verse 1, “He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.” Now that’s  a pretty comforting verse for me, because I believe that the presence of God can be anywhere, so knowing that I abide under the shadow of the Almighty regardless of where or when is great. The main thing about this chapter that stuck out to me is verses 15-16. “He shall call upon Me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble;  I will deliver him and honor him. 16 With long life I will satisfy him, and show him My salvation.” I guess this blog goes along the lines of Chan’s post on Leviticus 26..again.  For me particularly, because in my mind, I focus on the consequence of things way too much.  In school, work or whatever, the thing that keeps me from doing something I shouldn’t is the consequence. But how often do I think to myself, “I don’t need to do this because of the benefits of Papa’s promises.” Again, Papa has changed the way I saw something. Apparently I looked at a lot things the wrong way back in my youth.

Am I willing to kill off everything?

2 Chronicles 15 has Asa meeting with Azariah (the Spirit of God had come upon him so he went to speak with Asa).  Azariah tells Asa that as long as he is with the Lord, the Lord will be with him.  In other words, as long as you are walking in obedience and staying the course, you wil be with God.  Judah’s direction would depend upon Asa walking with God.  If Asa seeks God, then God will be found by him.  That is good news.  God isn’t going anywhere.  He is there waiting to be found.  Asa simply needs to run after him.

Well, Asa agrees and he and all of Judah, Benjamin, with a bit of Ephraim, Manasseh, and Simeon all make a covenant to seek the Lord God with all of their heart and with al of their soul.  So, they are running after God with everything that they have.  What does that look like?  For them it looked like “putting to death everyone who did not seek the Lord God; whether man or woman, small or great.”  Now that is commitment.  Makes $50 seem pretty dang insignificant.  Asa even had the Queen Mother (his grandmother) removed because she had built an idol.

So, am I this serious about my relationship with Christ?  Am I putting to death everything that gets in the way?  What about those things that I was called to do?  Do I alow them to become the focus instead of letting God be the focus.  If it isn’t bringing me closer to Papa, then I must re-evaluate it, submit it to Him and ask whether or not it be continued.  I believe that we hold onto things that are dear to us and are unwilling to put the old man completely to death.  Asa new the importance of a covenant.  He was not going to allow anything to get between him and his covenant with God.  I MUST be willing to do the same.

Papa, help me to see those areas in my life that still need to be cut down.  I want to be with you so that you will be with me.  I seek you with my whole heart; I hold nothing back.  Father, remove anything in me that is not pleasing to you.  I covenant today to live for you.  I sacrifice my life to you today.  Take me, everything I am.  When you say go, I will go.  When you say stop, I wil stop.  I am yours 100%.  I love you and give myself to you today; ALL of my heart; ALL of my soul; ALL of my mind; and ALL of my strength.

Acts 12

Acts Chapter 12 is just as exciting as the rest so far.  Here is what I got.  The Jews, who were Gods chosen people, enjoyed and reveled in the fact that other people were dying because they were not preaching the same thing they were.  Do I do that as a Christian?  Do I kill, maybe not physically, but do I count them out or cast them off or find enjoyment in others suffering when I think they are wrong and they get proved of that?  Do I treat others like that because they are not preaching or believing the same thing as me?  That’s just crazy to me.  I mean Gods chosen people are thrilled with the death of Christians.  Peter getting let loose is pretty cool.  The fact that a lot of people are still praying.  Oh man my lack of faith.  That looks hopeless to me.  Peter is locked up literally sleeping between 2 guards with chains on, behind a cell with 2 more guards out front, then past 2 other guards, then in a compound with some kind of big door that keeps them out from the street, and its locked.  They were still praying that God do something and release him or help him, who knows.  I would be praying God don’t let him be miserable, my lack of faith.  Its pathetic.  I think I am seeing this theme lately.  God showed me again what do you believe and why?  Am I believing things that might not be true and discounting others beliefs?  Obviously some just don’t line up, but you know what I mean.  Also just my lack of belief in God.  I am just not sure I would be praying like that when everything was pretty much done but the actual hanging.  Even if he was hung its still not done though huh?  Well OK. 

Dad let me believe in you.  Let me believe that nothing is impossible even though it looks impossible.  Thank you for not killing me off yet, even though you deserve to.  I love you and need your grace over me.  Help me to find You, not someone preaching or teaching You but You.

I made this short for you guys because I know how y’all feel about reading. 

Selflessness… use it or lose it…

Romans 1:21

“…futile in their thinking…” is a really nice way to translate this.  I looked up the word translated into “futile” and it actually means “vain.”  So, in essence, what 1:21 is saying is humanity took its focus off God and put it on itself.  It began looking at itself.  I see that every day in my own life, in the lives of my kids, in the grocery store parking lot, at football games, wherever.  We are a selfish and self-centered people by nature.  Our selfishness leads down a road we don’t want to go down.  Verses 21-27 describe how this self-centered, me-centric view led to all kinds of depravity that must have just broken God’s heart and sickened him.

Romans 1:24-25

Romans 1:28-32

Verse 28 uses “… a debased mind…” That is another nice way to put it.  The word means “reprobate” which, according to Webesters, means “to foreordain to damnation; morally corrupt,” and then a laundry list of man’s depravity follows in the next verses.

The point for me this morning is that it is easy to take my eyes off Him, even if only for a second.  One minute leads to two minutes leads to 4 minutes, etc.  The self-centered road is a slippery one that is easy to walk down.  Think about it, we don’t have to teach our children to be selfish.  It starts early and comes naturally.  One of the first words any toddler learns is “MINE!”  Selflessness – the way Christ lived – is something that has to be learned. It is an on-going lesson that must be used and practiced daily or it goes away – like a foreign language – use it or lose it.

Dad, I need you today.  Fix my eyes on you in all that I do.  Don’t let my heart wander down the road that starts with Me.  My only hope is to have spiritual blinders, as a thoroughbred in a race, to keep me looking only in the direction I am to run.  Thank you for your amazing grace and mercy on me, on all of us.  Thank you for your love.  Help me be aware for opportunities to be selfless today.  Amen.